Hands are Not for Hitting by Martine Agassi

When Musa started hitting and biting (even at me!), especially when he didn't get his way, I remember feeling helpless about not being able to assert some control over it. Honestly, I didn't know where he picked up those actions because Zainal and I never displayed that kind of behaviour. I also realised that perhaps he was having just as much trouble dealing with his feelings of dissatisfaction and frustration as I was.

To nip the problem in the bud, so to speak, I turned to this great award-winning series of books called "The Best Behaviour Series" that showed kids socially acceptable behaviour in different situations. I have several titles from this series, and this particular one, Hands are Not for Hitting, by Martine Agassi (a therapist in children's behaviour), helped me out in a way. Kids are reminded that hands are not for hitting and shows the various good things that our hands can do instead, i.e. drawing, hugging, playing, etc.

This is a colourful board book -- which I absolutely love because they are so durable and can withstand lots of grubby hands and rough handling! The images and colours are vibrant, the pictures are big and clear, and the words used are simple. Each page shows kids in different social settings, i.e. playing, making friends, eating, etc., and offer a great way to start a discussion with the child about how to behave.

For example, one page demonstrates that hands are for "taking care" with a picture of two sisters, one brushing her teeth and the other washing her hands. Musa and I would talk about the importance of personal hygiene, and even do the actions of teeth-brushing and hand-washing. When I wanted to get Musa into the routine of brushing his teeth, I used this book (and this particular page) to reinforce his efforts.

There's also a thoughtful section at the end for parents with some excellent parenting tips on how to redirect a child's frustrated energy. Here's an excerpt from it:

"The majority of toddlers will go through a phase where they hit. We can teach them that feeling angry is okay, but hitting is not. Most often, toddlers hit when they feel strong emotions that they have trouble expressing through words...encourage using words to express emotions as a step to avoid hitting. You can help toddlers learn to name their feelings..."

Hands are Not for Hitting
By Martine Agassi
Illustrated by Marieka Heinlen
Published by Free Spirit Publishing
ISBN: 9781575422008
Price: USD7.95
Recommended for ages 0-3